1. Never Select the Place/Location
Just give options. You don’t know how much is in his pocket or wallet so be open. Not that you should settle for something silly or stupid but just be open. Once, a dude asked me where I wanted to eat- that he could get me food from anywhere in Abuja. “Just say the place and it’s done”. I told him to be very careful when he told that to a girl but he insisted. So I said, OK, I wanted fries and chicken from Dunes. The guy said, “Where is Dunes?” I said it was in Maitama. The guy just laughed that fake hesitant laugh and said, “Baby, let’s take it slow”. On a normal day I can take myself out to Dunes- not upstairs sha (for now). When I told him it didn’t cost much, he was like he took a girl out to Chopsticks and she came with her friends and he heard, nwen that day. Remember, you both don’t want to set the tone for something your budget can’t sustain. Don’t be like Laraba who went to a Chinese restaurant and had to leave because her date wasn’t going to pay even though he suggested the place. So you can suggest 10th floor, the Hilton and Salamandar. If he starts to clear his throat, quickly come down to Mr. Biggs or the Bukka behind your office. Yes, that one near your office- the ewedu is delicious. Just don’t forget to have a good time. Might I suggest, a movie isn’t good for a first date with certain exceptions. I’ll tell you why soon.
In the same breath, you don’t want to look to over dressed like you’ve been dying to go on a date for centuries or under dressed;; you want the guy to know you take your appearances seriously.At the same time, you don’t want to give the guy “the go down to the other side” look except you want to deliberately look drabby ( and I don’t mean that you want to test him, if he’ll go beyond physical appearances. He will so shock you!) I get it, you’re religious but that don’t mean you should dress up like a poverty stricken hermit. What’s with the bushy eyebrows, the 6 week old plaits and skirts that don’t have matter/ Those raincoat skirts just occupy space. If you are not interested in the guy, then you should by all means, dress however you want (as long as people don’t see you). I have done this before and it worked. Be sure not to give off the wrong impression when you go out on the first, second, third, no matter the number of dates- be careful. If you are dressed like, “Giddy up, dude, Come up hither”, you’re gonna get that and more. So you know the rules: busty- don’t bare them out; leggy- let’s not almost see your bikini line. You catch my drift.
It’s so important not to look trashy or ready to go down low because, sadly most first dates end up being one-night stands and you don’t want to end up being a statistic, do you?
Anything can happen. He may decide to become a superhero and save a man drowning in a pool, leaving you while he goes to the hospital (this happened to me. Honest! Pool Side- a hotel starting with V and ending with…clears throat) or the POS machines may not be working or he may not have enough money. Anything can happen. So make sure you carry enough vex money because…it ain’t funny when you’re stranded and money, no matter how little can give you some kind of leverage.